Repair most egregious mistakes in onboarding modal (#1964)

* Repair most egregious mistakes

The deployed changes broke the pedagogy and curriculum built into the design of the onboarding modals, which had been reviewed and approved by various other contributors. While the changed layouts of the pages make some of the original decisions impossible to re-implement without substantial work, these changes should at least make the modals not outright terrible. 

The empty confusing description of Mastodon was replaced with an actual basic explanation of federation. The language was modified to be friendly and conversational again. Grammatical errors were fixed. The explanations of local and federated timelines were re-ordered to be in the direct that the menus go, top to bottom, and the sentence was re-added which explains that they are what "public timelines" refers to (since this phrasing is used elsewhere in the UI) and suggests the user use them to discover who to follow. A figure of the profile picture that lives above the compose box was padded to page two to serve as a landmark for less technically literate users to easily find the compose box and understand that the next page is moving upwards, so that they can find the search bar. 

Ideally, the elephant artwork should be either removed or replaced with something less depressing.  Room should be made to point users at the notifications column's settings icon because "how do I turn off the notification noise" is one of the most asked questions of new users and those icons are not easily noticeable. This last part may be made obsolete if the settings UI is later re-worked.

* Change copy

This commit addresses copy change suggestions made in the PR discussion

* Add periods to ends of sentences missing periods
* Made "Home" "Federated" "Local" and "Notifications" lowercase
* Separate explanation of "connecting" and the word "instance" into two sentences, to make the sentence less dense.

1 files changed, 13 insertions, 9 deletions

diff --git a/app/assets/javascripts/components/features/ui/components/onboarding_modal.jsx b/app/assets/javascripts/components/features/ui/components/onboarding_modal.jsx
index e5c395119..36e0d0c8a 100644
--- a/app/assets/javascripts/components/features/ui/components/onboarding_modal.jsx
+++ b/app/assets/javascripts/components/features/ui/components/onboarding_modal.jsx
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ const PageOne = ({ acct, domain }) => (
 
     <div>
       <h1><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_one.welcome' defaultMessage='Welcome to Mastodon!' /></h1>
-      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_one.federation' defaultMessage='Mastodon is a social network that belongs to everyone.' /></p>
-      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_one.handle' defaultMessage='You are on {domain}, one of many independent Mastodon instances. Your full handle is {handle}' values={{ domain, handle: <strong>{acct}@{domain}</strong> }}/></p>
+      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_one.federation' defaultMessage='Mastodon is a network of independent servers joining up to make one larger social network. We call these servers: <em>Instances</em>' /></p>
+      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_one.handle' defaultMessage='You are on {domain}, so your full handle is {handle}' values={{ domain, handle: <strong>{acct}@{domain}</strong> }}/></p>
     </div>
   </div>
 );
@@ -39,6 +39,9 @@ PageOne.propTypes = {
 const PageTwo = () => (
   <div className='onboarding-modal__page onboarding-modal__page-two'>
     <div className='figure non-interactive'>
+       <div className='pseudo-drawer'>
+        <NavigationBar account={me} />
+        </div>
       <ComposeForm
         text='Awoo! #introductions'
         suggestions={Immutable.List()}
@@ -91,26 +94,26 @@ const PageFour = ({ domain, intl }) => (
       <div className='row'>
         <div>
           <div className='figure non-interactive'><ColumnHeader icon='home' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.home_title)} /></div>
-          <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_four.home' defaultMessage='Home timeline shows posts from people you follow'/></p>
+          <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_four.home' defaultMessage='The home timeline shows posts from people you follow.'/></p>
         </div>
 
         <div>
           <div className='figure non-interactive'><ColumnHeader icon='bell' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.notifications_title)} /></div>
-          <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_four.notifications' defaultMessage='Notifications show when someone interacts with you' /></p>
+          <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_four.notifications' defaultMessage='The notifications column shows when someone interacts with you.' /></p>
         </div>
       </div>
 
       <div className='row'>
         <div>
-          <div className='figure non-interactive' style={{ marginBottom: 0 }}><ColumnHeader icon='globe' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.federated_title)} /></div>
+          <div className='figure non-interactive' style={{ marginBottom: 0 }}><ColumnHeader icon='users' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.local_title)} /></div>
         </div>
 
         <div>
-          <div className='figure non-interactive' style={{ marginBottom: 0 }}><ColumnHeader icon='users' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.local_title)} /></div>
+          <div className='figure non-interactive' style={{ marginBottom: 0 }}><ColumnHeader icon='globe' type={intl.formatMessage(messages.federated_title)} /></div>
         </div>
       </div>
 
-      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_five.public_timelines' defaultMessage='Federated timeline lists public posts from everyone who people on {domain} follow. Local timeline is the same, but limited to people on {domain}.' values={{ domain }} /></p>
+      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_five.public_timelines' defaultMessage='The local timeline shows public posts from everyone on {domain}. The federated timeline shows public posts from everyone who people on {domain} follow. These are the Public Timelines, a great way to discover new people.' values={{ domain }} /></p>
     </div>
   </div>
 );
@@ -128,7 +131,7 @@ const PageSix = ({ admin }) => {
       <p>
         <FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.admin' defaultMessage="Your instance's admin is {admin}." values={{ admin: <Permalink href={admin.get('url')} to={`/accounts/${admin.get('id')}`}>@{admin.get('acct')}</Permalink> }} />
         <br />
-        <FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.read_guidelines' defaultMessage='Please, do not forget to read the {guidelines}!' values={{ guidelines: <a href='/about/more' target='_blank'><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.guidelines' defaultMessage='community guidelines' /></a> }}/>
+        <FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.read_guidelines' defaultMessage="Please read {domain}'s {guidelines}!" values={{domain, guidelines: <a href='/about/more' target='_blank'><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.guidelines' defaultMessage='community guidelines' /></a> }}/>
       </p>
     );
   }
@@ -138,7 +141,8 @@ const PageSix = ({ admin }) => {
       <h1><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.almost_done' defaultMessage='Almost done...' /></h1>
       {adminSection}
       <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.github' defaultMessage='Mastodon is free open-source software. You can report bugs, request features, or contribute to the code on {github}.' values={{ github: <a href='https://github.com/tootsuite/mastodon' target='_blank' rel='noopener'>GitHub</a> }} /></p>
-      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.apps_available' defaultMessage='There are {apps} available for iOS, Android and other platforms. And now... Bon Appetoot!' values={{ apps: <a href='https://github.com/tootsuite/documentation/blob/master/Using-Mastodon/Apps.md' target='_blank' rel='noopener'><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.various_app' defaultMessage='various mobile apps' /></a> }} /></p>
+      <p><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.apps_available' defaultMessage='There are {apps} available for iOS, Android and other platforms.' values={{ apps: <a href='https://github.com/tootsuite/documentation/blob/master/Using-Mastodon/Apps.md' target='_blank' rel='noopener'><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.various_app' defaultMessage='mobile apps' /></a> }} /></p>
+      <p><em><FormattedMessage id='onboarding.page_six.appetoot' defaultMessage='Bon Appetoot!' /></em></p>
     </div>
   );
 };